Tag: Blessing

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TMI Friday – Grandma – International Women’s Day

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Good Morning Sunshines! “She made broken look beautiful and strong look invincible. She walked with the Universe on her shoulders and made it look like a pair of wings.”  ―Ariana Dancu

It’s TMI Friday! Yesterday was International Women’s Day so I wanted to talk about the most amazing woman I’ve ever known, my grandma. My grandma was/is my hero. She taught me so much. Grandma was a godly woman who always made time for the word. She started and ended each day in prayer. She never raised her voice. If she got mad she would start talking really low so you had to concentrate on what she was saying. It was worse than someone yelling.  I could never get anything past her. If I called “just to say hi”, she always knew exactly what was going on before I even told her. My grandma was a farmer’s wife, she had six kids, and many grandkids. Grandma never had favorites. I would joke and tell her “it’s ok to say I’m your favorite.” She would let me know her favorite was whoever needed her most at that time. She always made you feel like you were the most important person when she talked to you. She really listened.

My grandma had gotten a job out of the house for a few years and worked in an arcade. Yes, a video game arcade! If you would have met her at first you would have thought this was strange. However, after 5 minutes of watching her around all the young people who came through you would know she was right where she was supposed to be. They loved her! Grandma would call kids out on their baggy pants, wild looks, bad attitudes, and always get to the root of the issues. I remember one day going to work with her and a group of kids came in being loud and disrespectful. Grandma walked up to them and told them to watch their language, and pull up their pants because she had no desire to see their behinds. One of the kids got mouthy and grandma started talking real low. I’m not sure what she said, but the next thing I know, their pants are pulled up and they are saying “Yes Mama.” She walked back up to her seat, grabbed some quarters, gave them each a few, and went and played Lady Bug, her favorite game. Everyone loved Grandma.

Grandma passed away a few years ago on, February 14, 2011. This seemed so fitting for her. I was so sad and just wanted to lay in bed all day and cry. However, I could hear my grandma saying “How long are you going to cry?’ (Read my post,  Finding the Good, to understand that a little better) I cried for a while and then knew it was going to be ok. For me, knowing she was spending Valentines with her first love was so fitting. I miss her every day. When my time comes I hope I am half as loved and respected as she was. Grandma was such an amazing example of love, never judging. She met you where you were at. I am so thankful for her and the amazing woman she was. I hope you have an amazing woman in your life who can help you Find The Good.

family · Inspirational · Uncategorized

TMI Friday-Birthday

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IMG_0480Good Morning Sunshines! While I was on my hiatus of writing and planning my daughter’s wedding, I received a few DM’s (direct messages) from random people letting me know they missed me writing and really liked my TMI Fridays. Thank you to those who reached out to check on me and letting me know you enjoy my almost daily post.

Happy TMI Friday! Today’s post is all about why I love my birthday. March 18 is my birthday and this year I will be 47. I am very ok with my age and love to celebrate. Think about it, what is the alternative? If you don’t have a birthday you are no longer here.  I have always loved my birthday and other people’s birthdays. I love to celebrate people. For me, birthdays mean breakfast in bed, gifts, and being loved on by your friends and family. That happens for anyone in my family and close friends, not just me. My hubby knows I love my birthday and has let me turn it into a birthday month. However, I have tried to do something different this year and that’s celebrate every day.

I really want to celebrate life and not take advantage of it. Every day so far this year I have done something small just to celebrate me/life. I found that the days were running together, then the weeks, months, and even years. I needed to slow things down. A lot of the times my moment of just me is sitting outside with the dogs, feeling the sun and listening to music that makes me feel happy to be alive. The other day I listened to a whole album. I have no idea the last time I did that. For me, celebrating me/life isn’t about a party, it’s about being thankful that I am still here and enjoying every moment of it. Feeling the aches and pains of my muscles from my workout makes me happy. Things that use to bother me, now make me happy. Getting a phone call from a family member or friend makes me smile. I used to wish people would just text, but slowing down to talk to someone is so much better. One day we wont be able to talk anymore and I never want to miss that chance. Starting today, I hope you can start celebrating you/life daily and Find The Good In It.

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Mask

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IMG_0464Good Morning Sunshines! “How long will it take before people stop being polite and start getting real?” – Real World

What kind of mask do you wear? We all have them; sometimes we have several, depending on who we are with. For years I wore a mask of a happy marriage. We would fight, a lot of the time it was physical. So, when I told people I was getting a divorce, no one understood. I was lying to people for years to protect myself and him. I wore a mask as a teen to hide myself from almost everyone. My mom had walked out on me when I was 15 because she needed to get help for her drug addiction, leaving me to live on my own. The only person who knew was my boyfriend and eventually his mom. It wasn’t till I was 17, almost 18, that the state found out and sent me to go live with my dad. It’s crazy the life we can live behind these masks.

As I was talking to a group of people the other day about the masks we wear, someone said something that struck a nerve with me. “What am I doing that people aren’t comfortable enough to take down their mask?” I really try not to wear a mask anymore and be transparent with people. I want people to know who I am. I also want to be able to pour into people and love on them so they feel comfortable taking down their mask. I challenge you to look at your mask and the people you surround yourself with and see who and where you can take down your mask around. Find people who will except you and help you Find The Good In Your Life.

family · Inspirational · Uncategorized

Who Are You?

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986471BF-BB1D-430F-BAA3-B1F96073FA84Good Morning Sunshines! I’m back! My daughter is married! The wedding was amazing and I have recovered. I’m looking forward to talking with all of you again.

We are all created to be individuals. So why do we compare ourselves to others? How boring would the world be if we all looked and acted the same? In my 20’s and early 30’s I really did compare myself a lot to my friends, the women I’d pass on the street, and even people I saw in the movies. I was never satisfied with my clothing size, the “things” I could do (because I wanted to be gifted or talented like others) even my personality. I wished I was different. I have a loud laugh and I’m very animated. I tried not to overdo it around most people, worried they won’t accept me for who I really am.

I’m not sure when the mindset change was, but I do remember reading…..

“Why fit in when you were born to stand out?” ~ Dr. Seuss

Such wise words! I was about 35 when I decided I would live my life out loud. I have a lot to say. I really have gone through a lot and I believe our tests are our testimonies, so I decided I would start liking those things I wanted to change. I started caring less and less about other people’s opinion about what I was doing in my life. I remember the first time I put down a book I had started reading and said to my self, “I am not enjoying this, I’m not going to read it.” That was huge for me. I have walked out of movies, left restaurants and even stopped hanging around people who were no longer bringing happiness to my life. I no longer had the need for everyone’s approval because I now had my own. I know for some this can be hard in a world of “likes” and “friends”. My hope for you today is that you will, Find The Good In You.

family · Inspirational · Uncategorized

Rare and Beautiful Treasures

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Books-You-Can-Read-in-an-AfternoonGood Morning Sunshine! “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” ~Mignon McLaughlin

Yesterday was my husband and my half-year anniversary. Everyday it amazes me how much more I really do love him. Yesterday was a busy day. He worked all day, I did wedding stuff for my daughter, and then we had an appointment. We came home ate and just sat around the table talking. When the kids got home they joined us. We sat around the table just talking and laughing and it truly filled my heart with so much joy. It reminded me of something I had read earlier. I had journaled something after reading my devotional and this is what it said…..

This morning in my devotional I was reading something I’ve read so many times before but until today I never realized how it applies to me and my marriage. I always wonder if others laugh like our family does? Are they as excited as we are to see each other? Do they sit and talk just to know and understand what is happening in their lives and how they feel? I read…

Proverbs 24:3-4; By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; through knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.

Our treasures are those moments of laughter and tears as we sit and talk and understand each other. Communication. It’s so important in all relationships. Today, I’d like to challenge you to Find The Good In Your Home.

family · Inspirational · Uncategorized

T.M.I.Friday

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diary-968603_960_720Good Morning Sunshines! “When you start to do the things that you truly love, it wouldn’t matter whether it is Monday or Friday; you would be so excited to wake up each morning to work on your passions.” ― Edmond Mbiaka

It’s Friday!!! The day where I just let you into too much information about my life. This will probably read more like a diary entry than my normal positive blogs, but here you go….

We have made it through another week and through a month of 2018. January is gone and February is here. Our daughter’s wedding is in 15 days. I haven’t been posting every day because the wedding has taken over. Not in a bad way, but it has defiantly helped me step up my gym time. I also bought a dress that was a half size too small because the size up was too big.

So, let me tell you about this week. We have finalized so much stuff this week for the wedding, we started two Bible studies at our home, been trying to help my mom with stuff in Puerto Rico, trying to finish writing my book, starting a new website, on top of trying to do our “normal” everyday things. I never feel like I really do a lot till I speak to other people. It’s then that people will say, “Wow, you are busy.” To me that’s normal. Today I am getting my hair cut and colored. If you know me I like “fun” colors. With my daughter’s wedding coming up I went “normal” but she has decided she wanted a fun color because it’s more me. I’m excited to have “me hair” for the wedding too. Speaking of the wedding, our son and daughter-in-law will be here in 13 days. That means our amazing granddaughter will be here. My hubby and I are so excited to have her here and love on her.

Well, it’s time to get up and get this day started. Sorry it’s not my normal get up and slay today post but I hope whatever you do today, you will Find The Good In Your Life.

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Mondays!

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mondays!

Good Morning Sunshines! “Mondays are tough for those people who don’t know how to spend them cheerfully. Get up and have fun today!” ~ unanimous

Have you ever woken up grumpy and not known why and said, “No one better mess with me today.”? I think we have all had those days. I know Mondays were the worst days for my employees. I’ve had a case of the Mondays before myself. It would usually start on Sunday night. I would start thinking about the week ahead and everything I needed to get done. It was only 3 pm on Sunday but I was already in the next week and no longer enjoying my weekend, my family time. Then come Monday I was moody and did not want to be there. UGH!!! Something needed to change.

I had read a  book where the person said to challenge yourself to not have a bad day. Keep telling yourself it’s not a bad day, and to be positive. This took some training but I really did learn how to do this. I would start to get in a “Monday Funk” and I would have to stop myself and think of positive things. I would literally make myself say three positive things right there and then. When you are thinking of the blessings in your life it’s hard to think about the negative.

These days, Mondays are my favorite day of the week. I try to have it as a day I look forward to by meeting a girlfriend for coffee, going to the gym, and prepping for the rest of the week. I very rarely have bad days anymore. I will stop and realize I am not having a bad day, I am having a bad moment. That moment in my day will not be my full day, it is just something that’s happening right now that I will need to move past. Don’t let the bad moments dictate your day. Find The Good In Your Day.

family · Inspirational · Uncategorized

Banner Blindness

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IMG_0241Hello Sunshines! “It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.” ~Henry David Thoreau

How many of us ignore the ads that are on our social media these days? Crazy how we talk about something or look up something, but then we quickly start to ignore them again. This is banner blindness. But what about in our everyday life? Do we start to go blind too? Maybe not blind, but just don’t notice the change that’s happening. A friend gets a haircut, you don’t notice. The gas station you always go to changes names but you don’t notice. We get so caught up in our everyday life that we don’t stop and look around us and notice the changes that are happening in the world around us.

I have rose bushes outside my front door. Every day when I leave the house I will literally stop and smell the roses. I do that because when I was working 12 hour plus days I got so caught up in my work I forgot there was a world going on outside. One day I was going into work late, when I walked outside and noticed these beautiful roses. These rose bushes had been there as long as we had lived in the house, but I didn’t notice them because I would leave so early and come home late, my sights focused on my next task. But now when I leave my house and smell these roses, it reminds me to stop and notice the world around me. I don’t want to be blind to the world around me anymore. I want to notice not just the simple beautiful roses, but the people in need on the corner. I want to help others Find The Good In Their Life.

family · Inspirational · Uncategorized

It’s Not In The Budget

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372D684A-5852-460C-B974-815D7AD432DB-40788-00000A7ED3A9B2F0Good Afternoon Sunshines! “The budget is not just a collection of numbers, but an expression of our values and aspirations.” ~ Jacob Lew

Have you ever said “It’s not in my budget,” or “I don’t have time for that?” I found out it’s never in my budget or I don’t have time for it if it’s not a priority to me. Our daughter’s wedding is coming up and the money we could have used a million other ways is being used to pay for a wedding because it is what is important to us. I pay for a gym membership because my health is important to me. I spend time reading books and listening to podcasts every day because growing and learning is important to me. However, I have had people tell me, “You should really watch this new show. It’s amazing!” The next time I see them they would ask, “What did you think?” To be honest, I haven’t had the time to watch it. Why didn’t I have I have the time? It’s because it wasn’t important to me. Not that my friend wasn’t important, it was that my time was important and I didn’t want to spend it on something that I was not sure I would enjoy.

Our time and resource are precious, and we need to be careful how we spend them. You will very rarely ever catch me doing something I really just don’t want to do; and if I am, it’s because the person I am with means more to me than that thing I am doing. When my kids were teenagers I stopped saying “It’s not in our budget,” and started telling them the truth, “That is not a priority.” As as example, they asked “Why don’t we have a tv and cable like my friends?” This truly was not, and still is not, a priority for us. Explaining to a teenager (and some adults) why we don’t have these things may be annoying, but I believe in being transparent about my life, so we would explain, “We don’t have time to sit in front of the tv, so why would we spend money on something we don’t use?” When I have asked my boss for a raise for an employee and he would say, “It’s not in the budget”, what I really wish he would have said was, “It’s not a priority,” because I would see money being spent in other places that to me was not a priority. I say ALL that to say this…. before you say it’s not in the budget or you don’t have time, be honest with yourself and others. Is this just not a priority? When you’re making the decision to spend your time or resources on something, make sure you ask yourself is it’s helping you Find The Good In Your Life.

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Making Memories

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IMG_0080Good Morning Sunshines! “Children have neither past nor future; they enjoy the present, which very few of us do.” ~ Jean de la Bruyere

This year for Christmas my daughter decided to turn my family movies into DVD from VHS (best gift this year). We were watching a home movie of when they were little and we were visiting my mom and family in Puerto Rico. As I was watching this video, besides thinking my kids were the cutest, I couldn’t stop thinking I was a jerk. My son kept asking if he could look through the video camera and I kept telling him no because I didn’t want it to break. It really wouldn’t have hurt anything if I allowed him to look through it, but I didn’t want to risk it. Then I started thinking about how, as my kids were growing up, I was always worried about keeping a clean house and being worried about what others would say if they stopped by. I remember my kids asking me to play with them but I didn’t have the time because I always had something to do. If you’re a parent you can probably look back and remember these moments as well. I know I will never get those moments back, but I can learn from them.

Thankfully I am a grandparent now, also a godmother, and aunt. I almost get a do-over because I realized the blessing is in the journey. Being worried about a clean house and other people’s opinions aren’t what matter, but rather making memories. When a friend calls I answer because, most likely, I’m going to laugh with that person on the other end. I’m no longer worried about what others will say if they come over and see the lived-in house I have, but more worried about the memories I will make with people and Finding The Good In Life.

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Finding Balance

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Good Morning Sunshines! “Never get so busy making a living, that you forget to make a life.” ~ Dolly Parton

A few years ago I had two strokes due to stress. I was so focused on my job and didn’t understand balance that I worked myself almost to death. I had a co-worker who, when she would travel to different offices, she would enjoy it by going out and having dinner, met the people in the area, made friends and still got her work done. On the other hand, I would be in the office for 12 hours a day, eat at my desk, and then go back to the hotel and work some more. I felt guilty if I enjoyed myself too much when traveling for work. I was there to work. This was my chance to get ahead and get extra done without being interrupted. I wished I could be like my co-worker, but I had a job to do and wasn’t there for fun.

This was not healthy. I burnt myself out. I took a break from work for a while and came back ready to have balance. I would fly out on Monday, back on Friday, making myself go out to eat at least once while I was traveling. Still not able to find the balance I needed because I wasn’t putting my health first and at least working out in the morning, I gained 20 pounds. My only exercise was walking through the airport. Even with me trying to find the balance by going out to eat once became a task and not something I was enjoying. I loved my job and traveling was fun. I enjoyed the people I worked with. Even on the weeks I wasn’t traveling I was still in the office for 12 hours and working when I got home. I had another health scare in March when I had my yearly. We thought the breast cancer was back. Nothing like a health scare to make you reevaluate what is most important to you.

As much as I loved my job, I love my family more, and I knew something had to change. I gave my notice to my job and decided it was time to find balance. As I was searching for balance I had to decide what was most important. For me it was my health, my family, my church, the community, and helping others. I started working out almost every day and my hubby tries to go with me when he can. We will sit and eat breakfast together and talk in the morning. I volunteer full-time at my church, and I get to spend time with people by going to lunch and being there for people who need me or just need someone.  I lead a bible study and we go into the community and give back, feeding the homeless or thanking the firefighters by bringing them goodies. I decided that writing was one way (there are other ways too) I would help others and hope they would learn from my past challenges and be able to Find The Good In Their Life.

family · Inspirational · Uncategorized

Happy Birthday!

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IMG_0047Good Morning Sunshines! A daughter is just a little girl who grows up to be your best friend.

Today is my daughter’s birthday! (I told her I would write about her today) I call her “My Pretty”. She is truly a blessing in my life. I think about the day she was born and remember how she looked like a little doll. She was so perfect. I would dress her up in little pink dresses. She would love when I would sing to her, “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy, when skies are grey. You’ll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.” As she grew up she realized I really couldn’t sing. The teenage years weren’t too bad except for age 14, when I loved her but didn’t like her (I’ll tell y’all about that another day). She tested me in so many different ways. Looking back and hearing other people’s stories, she wasn’t really that bad. Both of my children told me everything… sometimes too much. However, I always knew where they were. The lines of communication have always been open and they were always allowed to express their feelings. Ciara got married in August to a nice young man, Deon. It was a very small wedding. Just us, his parents and our pastors. We are having a big ceremony in February because I told her she might regret not having the big wedding if she didn’t. Planning has been a lot of work, but she is worth it. We had her bridal shower this past weekend and then she went with friends to Vegas to the bachelorette party. I love hearing the stories of her and her friends. Oh, to be that young again.  There are days I get sad because both of my kids are married and I feel like they don’t need me any more. But there is nothing like your daughter asking you, “Can we go get lunch and go shopping?” I love the relationship we have now. I don’t have to fuss at her any more. She has become my friend. We sit and talk about so many things. It’s hard to believe that little angel I held in my arms grew up to be my best friend. She truly is A Good In My Life.